Eye Queue

Chapter 1 - The Mermaid

Three guys are out having a relaxing day fishing. Out of the blue, they catch a mermaid who begs to be set free, in return granting each of them a wish. One of the guys just doesn't believe it, and says, "OK, if you can really grant wishes, then double my I.Q." The mermaid says "Done!" Suddenly the guy starts reciting Shakespeare flawlessly and analyzing it with extreme insight.

The second guy is so amazed he says to the mermaid: "Triple my I.Q." The mermaid says, "Done!" The guy starts to spout out all the mathematical solutions to problems that have been stumping the scientists throughout the ages: physics, chemistry, and more.

The last guy is so enthralled with the changes in his friends that he says to the mermaid, "Quintuple my I.Q." The mermaid looks at him and says, "You know, I normally don't try to change people's minds when they make a wish, but I really wish you'd reconsider." The guy says, "Nope, I want you to increase my I.Q. five times, and if you don't do it I won't set you free." "Please," says the mermaid, "You don't know what you're asking - it'll change your entire view of the universe. Won't you ask for something else: a million dollars, anything?"

But no matter what the mermaid said, the guy insisted on having his I.Q. increased five times the usual power. So the mermaid sighed, and after a moment said, "Done!" And he became a woman.

Chapter 2 - The Three Blondes

Three blond women were marooned on an island. As they were exploring they found a lamp. Two of them didn't believe that the lamp was anything so they ignored it. The third blond decided that it was a magic lamp. She rubbed it and a genie appeared.

This genie offered to grant each of the blondes one wish. The first one wished that she were smarter. The genie said, "Okay." The girl's hair turned red and she became smarter and swam off the island. The second blond asked to be made smarter than the first. The genie said, "Okay." The girl's hair turned black and she became smarter. She built a boat and sailed off the island. The third girl wished to be smarter than the the first two. The genie said, "Okay." The girl's hair turned brown, and she turned into a man. Then she walked over the bridge off the island.

Mermaid - Anonymous, from Usenet
Blondes - Courtesy of MHW

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